May 16 – It’s that Time of Year Again

It’s that time of year again. We celebrate mother’s and everything they represent. Unconditional love, supportive, caring, etc. It is one of the hardest times of year for infertiles. The pain in our hearts as we watch and celebrate others who have the one thing we want. The other hard part is being a foster parent. It can be so hard to watch a kiddo mourn the fact that they are not with their biological mother on this holiday. Everyone is making their moms’ cards in class, sharing stories and they are wondering why they cannot see their mom. They may act out or withdraw. It can be hard to be a mother figure for a kiddo who is hurting.

This is also the time of year where I become a fly in the boss’s stew as I drum up another letter pleading for my company to add infertility coverage to their insurance. The HR person in charge of benefits knows me by name. This will be my fourth request in 2 years.

My strategy this time is to speak to the competitors who offer this coverage, while we do not. I am also asking people who supported me last year with this to write up something to submit with mine. I know they will continue to ignore me and try to sweep this under the rug, but I will not give up. All I can do is continue to ask right? I mean what’s the harm?

We all mourn this holiday in our own way. I mourn by advocating. I have to do something to not feel useless. If I can try to get coverage I feel like I am impacting lives of people at my firm that I have never met. I am hoping that I can help them and me!

In addition I applied for the Baby Quest Foundation grant this month. I am open to any avenue possible to try and have a baby. They do the grant twice a year.  A lot of people apply, but it has better odds than the lottery right?

We are still on a break from fostering. We did get a call for a kid, even though we were not on the list, but the kid was accepted by someone else faster. It is funny how fast you can feel attached to a little one that you have not yet met. In both pregnancy and fostering.

I hope you all made it through the weekend with your heads held high. Mother’s Day can be tough. But we are tougher! Infertility can’t keep us down!

strength

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